Get out of this place.

Rich and Shelley wouldn’t let me in the picture with them, so I found a way. Happy Birthday, Shelley Brown.

New Orleans, Louisiana. 5.11.2012.

This is what Liz and I look like brushing our teeth at her mom’s house.

New Kent, Virginia. 4.2.2012.

RELATED: Click here if you should like to see what my mom and I look like brushing our teeth at her house for some reason, you weirdo.

I read a piece at Gold Room tonight that, as you can tell from my preacher’s garb, may have gotten a little bit gimmicky. Click here for the video. Thanks to everyone who showed up, even if it was just to eat some $1 tacos and watch the basketball game behind me.

New Orleans, Louisiana. 3.22.2012.

Kaia has developed a large sty on her right eye, which we are treating by placing a hot washcloth over it for five minutes at a time, three times a day.

Also, Liz has developed a case of March Madness now that her alma mater is in the NCAA tournament. She’s decked us out in matching Virginia Commonwealth University t-shirts for game days.

New Orleans, Louisiana. 3.15.2012.

Zeitoun! Kaia and I ran into him on Dauphine, on our way back from the dog park. When I asked some tourists on the sidewalk if they’d take our picture, the looks on their faces said they were scrambling to recognize this person I was treating like a celebrity. Afterward, Zeitoun quietly got into his construction van and I left them standing confused.

New Orleans, Louisiana. 3.9.2012.

When Stanis and I agreed to take Liz to the abandoned Six Flags, we had no idea she wasn’t going to enthusiastically participate in our “Let’s pretend like the ride is out of control” photos.

New Orleans, Louisiana. 3.3.2012.

GPOY: Shot-callin’ with Michael edition.

New Orleans, Louisiana. 11.11.2011.

When I smelled yesterday’s fried chicken sandwich I decided it may be time to at least get rid of the mustache. However, I underestimated how much fun I have with facial hair and I somehow ended up saving the only thing I was sure I wanted to get rid of. So, I have a mustache now.

New Orleans, Louisiana. 10.1.2011.

SIDENOTE: I realize I need to clean my bathroom mirror, and also that it’s kind of gross for me to be holding my disembodied beard. Sorry. Also, there’s my nipple.

So, apparently, babies do this thing where they cry for seemingly no reason, and then when you get them asleep, you can’t really move them or they’ll wake up and start crying again, so you have to hold them forever.

Little Rock, Arkansas. 9.3.2011.